Today is my husband’s and my 14th wedding anniversary. I’m beyond surprised we made it this far.
We got married on July 23, 2006 in an Atlanta courthouse. It was a cool Sunday afternoon; strange considering that we were in the middle of summer. I remember the day like it was yesterday. Leaves were on the ground and blowing. It almost fell like fall.
The only people at the courthouse were me, my husband and the female judge who married us. We spent $88 for the marriage license.
I’ve never dreamt of a big, fancy wedding. Never. I always knew that I wanted to get married at a courthouse. I don’t like big crowds and I don’t like a lot of attention, believe it or not.
As our 8th anniversary approached, I had the bright idea to renew our vows at the French Cloisters on Paradise Island. I love the ocean and it is hands down one of the most beautiful spots in The Bahamas.
I wanted to renew our vows to give our loved ones a chance to see us walk down the aisle – something none of them – not even our parents – had gotten the chance to do.
My husband and I planned a small wedding and held the renewal on our anniversary. That date fell on a Wednesday. Wednesday happens to be my favourite day of the week, probably because I was born on a Wednesday and it’s smack dab in the middle of the week.
Few people know this, but I was working at a PR firm and told no one of my plans to renew my vows. I worked as a talk show host at the time, and I did not want my then boss to ask me to get married on camera.
So, I planned in secret. I scheduled a day off and returned to work on Thursday like nothing happened.
The Day Was Far From Perfect
The day of the vow renewal was not perfect by any means.
I remember it being very hot. I mean, it was The Bahamas, but it seemed extra hot that day. What’s worse, One & Only, which owns the property, failed to deliver the drinks that were paid for in advance. I can’t begin to explain how angry I was.
Luckily, my cousin’s husband ran out and returned with a carload of water for the guests. Thank God for family.
The sound company that we hired to provide music was having issues when it was time to play the song I walked down the aisle to. It was supposed to be Christina Perri’s A Thousand Years.
Luckily, our incredible saxophonist recognised the problem and started playing Luther Vandross’ So Amazing.
The ceremony was small and quick. All of my family and friends who I invited showed-up in full force.
Even though our ceremony was beautiful, I would be lying if I didn’t tell you that I had more fun at our courthouse wedding. I’m a simple girl and I love and live for peace and tranquility.
We Are A Real Couple
Today, I posted a wedding photo on social media with a very honest caption. In it, I talked about how imperfect my marriage is.
Our marriage has never been perfect. Not even from day one. It has never been #relationshipgoals. In fact, I absolutely hate that saying.
My husband and I get on each other’s nerves constantly. Ask him and he’ll tell you. That’s bound to happen when you have two very strong people in a relationship.
There have been times when we have both wanted to call it quits. But, through the grace of God, we continued working. The work doesn’t stop.
I thank him for constantly fighting for us. I thank him for his support in the 14 years we have been married, and the nearly 18 years we have been together. I thank him for having my back.
It’s not easy being married to me. Trust me when I say that.
I didn’t want to post wedding photos in isolation. Sometimes, we get so caught up in the beauty of a photo that we forget that there are real people in the image.
Marriage is work. Don’t enter into it if you cannot deal with the bad times. There’ll be plenty of great moments. But, there will also be some crazy ones.
This Bahamian Gyal